An Introvert during Quarantine

Let me state up front that I'm well aware I'm different. I have a work from home job in the medical industry and I'm a born introvert. I'm buried in work all day, then loving the Zoom meetings on certain nights of the week that fulfill what little craving I have for social interaction. I have always preferred to shop online and --when I indulge at all-- carry out or delivery of a meal is fine by me.

I know there are a lot of people without a job, struggling to put food on the table, unable to leave the house to even search for work. The gig economy and the service industry are struggling and dying. There's no one leaving the house to go to a show, have a meal out, or even meet with friends for drinks. The entertainers, bartenders, wait staff, and even the zoo staff have no one to entertain. You don't realize how much of the economy depends on the service industry until it isn't there. The only ones left working are fast food/carry-out restaurant workers and grocery store clerks. (Ye gods, I feel so sorry for them.)

I know parents are ready to scream to discover that the little mini-mes they created are in reality hellions who don't have manners, courtesy, or self-control and now the parents can't blame the teachers. They are doing their best to home school, though many are reporting they are ready to give up. Those who have been home schooling their children for years shrug and say nothing, knowing any advice might be taken amiss. Even my own daughter got defensive about homeschooling her two ADHD school age children, and since I'm not there in the situation, she may even be right. I backed off.

It's Easter Sunday, and many churches struggled to put on a video service in hopes of doing what little they could to celebrate this important day on the Christian calendar. The Jewish community soldiers on, with the occasional mention that the Seder is a little odd/off this year without the usual gathering of family and friends.

Even those who normally might prefer to stay home might be struggling with the very thought of the restriction and rebelling against it. It's human nature to rebel against restrictions, perhaps. We can all take a bit of time in quarantine, but after awhile most people seem to need human contact. They crave not only physical touch, but the give and take of social interactions that are in the moment. You can't smile when there's a mask covering your face, and some folks can't deal with that.

It's Easter, and normally this would be a family occasion. If I wasn't serving at the church potluck, I'd be traveling down to visit my mother and brother with the full feast carefully prepared and wrapped to be shared. I'm not Christian, and don't want to be, but I don't mind a family feast. Mom's super unhappy that we aren't doing it, but this can't be helped. I won't even plan ahead to say, "Yes, when this is over we'll buy a ham and have our feast, even if it's the middle of July!"

I've started a "When It's Over" Jar. When you think of something you'd like to do but can't right now, you put your wish on a scrap of paper and drop it in the jar. My jar has five things in it right now. (Yes, I'm that much of an introvert.) One of them is Mom's wish for a family get-together. Another is to visit my Dad, who is over 80 now and a bit frail. Another is a trip to the zoo. I love the zoo. The rest are...well, I just don't remember. They aren't that important.

The so-called "stimulus money" is nothing but a loan from the grifter in the White House, borrowing against my tax refund next time. Yep, some stimulus. So, I'll pay off my medical bills a bit sooner than expected. (sigh) I wonder how many people are going to be furious when they realize the "free money" from the government isn't free at all come tax time next year?

I have work in the morning. Unlike so many others, I'm not bored. I'm busy. I'm buried in work, but I don't want to be out of a job and wondering how I'll pay my bills. So, I'm grateful. For now, the economic collapse that seems to be coming looks like a slow mudslide. I can't stop it. I'm not even sure I'm not in the way. All I can do is take one day at a time, and put one foot in front of the other until some barrier stops me.

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