They Lied...Again

...So why am I surprised the medical folks lied again? Why do I keep this wrong-headed belief that there are upstanding and truthful professionals in scrubs somewhere out there?

When my PCP's assistant ordered a CAT scan of my belly to ascertain the reason for my intermittent stomach pains, I asked specifically, "Is this the CAT scan where they use a needle?" (Hah! I've been suckered before, haven't I?) I referred to the iodine injection used in conjunction with the barium.

The two different persons both threw up their hands in the classic gesture of innocence and said, "Oh, no! This is just the circular array taking pictures of your stomach with barium in it. Here's the berry smoothie flavored barium. Just follow directions."

I followed directions and swallowed the barium as ordered. I'll even give the berry flavor a kudo for being much more palatable than the old banana flavored crap they used to sucker you into drinking. At least I didn't throw this stuff right back up. Yeah, barium on the prescribed empty stomach is enough to make me *want* to throw up, but I drove there despite the mild nausea. I was even smart enough this time to wear no metal on my torso --elastic waist pants and a sports bra.

I almost got suckered again, but this time when the tech told me about the iodine injection I puddled up and said it straight. "Damn them, they lied! They told me no needles!" Yes, I am that needle phobic. The tech changed her mind and reassured me I didn't have to have the injection. I took that option. You bet I did. The rest of the procedure was over and done in a flash.

I drove home, still shaking. One hour and 45 minutes until I can cuddle in my DH's arms. Right now, I badly want to just crawl into a corner and gibber like a madwoman.

One of these days, I'm going to write a story about how a patient finally cracked and blew up a hospital just so the hard-hearted, lying persons inside can learn what it is to be helpless and at another hard-hearted liar's mercy.

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